After a several year hiatus I’m back to writing and chasing my own kinks again. Not that I ever really came to a full stop, but real life threw in a few speedbumps that slowed me down.
But for now that’s behind me, and I’m back to interacting with perverts online (the intelligent kind who write and have a sense of humor about life, not the kind who send dick pics and ask ‘Wanna fuck?’).
I’ve given up social media for Lent. And for a variety of other reasons.
I do believe in God, and my faith is pretty important in my life. I don’t talk about it a lot, and write about it even less frequently, simply because I think YOU will ask me if you want to know. I don’t subscribe to the theory that I MUST hammer anyone on this planet with my beliefs, and I don’t identify with most of the ‘religious’ public figures you could name.
I truly believe that I honor God by treating people around me better than I treat myself, and I’m committed to spending time each day thinking about my place in the universe. Giving something I enjoy up for Lent each year is something I do as a part of my consideration of where I am in the universe. I don’t do it for any specific religion or denomination or church or pastor/priest/minister, and it’s certainly not something that most people know about me. I don’t hide it or lie about it, but I don’t brag about it either. I could also care less if you give up Oreos, orgasms, tv, or spending time with your in-laws. You do your thing, and I’ll do mine. 😀
So this year I decided to take a break from most of social media. I stay connected to most of my extended family through email and facebook, so I was reluctant to pull the plug on those for practical reasons. So I kept email, and deactivated my facebook. I’m staying away from Twitter, except for checking it a few times a week just in case someone has tried to get ahold of me on it.
I check Gmail each day, and there are about four people I’ll say ‘hi’ to if I see them on Hangouts, simply because chatting with them for a few minutes each week keeps me sane.
We are also having some old friends stay with us for most of each week for the next month or so while they handle some family/legal issues in town, and as nice as it will be having them around, it will be a drain on my time.
And work.
I’m one of those lucky ones (like probably most of you reading this) who has to work in order to eat. For the most part I like my job, although I’d happily give it up if I could. Due to some company restructuring we’ve had some upper management layoffs, which affords me with the opportunity to work six nights a week until mid-summer sometime. Yay me. I’m not real happy about it, and I think it’s grossly unfair. However it’s an income, and whatever doesn’t kill me will make me stronger right?
So for those reasons (and the book that I’m editing at the speed of erosion thanks to my pesky real life) I decided to step back from social media.
My thoughts so far:
Facebook is a freaking time burglar. Not the kind who will steal a can of soup to feed his hungry children. The kind who smashes your window, steals your valuables, trashes your stuff they don’t want, pees on your couch, clogs your toilet, kicks your dog, keys your car, and makes a bunch of long distance calls while they’re in your house. I can’t tell you how many times I’ll get on facebook for two minutes only to piss away an hour. Or more. Often much more. It feels good to NOT care what’s going on with everyone I ever met. Because I think the reality is that I don’t care what someone I went to high school with had for lunch. Or how much they hate/love something. Scrolling though all those posts on facebook was useless, and I feel good walking away from it. I care if someone dies, or has a baby, or gets married. I don’t care what color tie your uncle Albert was buried in however, or how much smarter your two week old is than every other baby, or why your husband is better than the rest of ours.
Getting my news from the internet is supposed to be better than getting it from tv. For starters I can pick and choose and stay informed about politics and world affairs while avoiding celebrity bullshit. Plus tv news totally sucks, unless you find an outlet that feeds your particular political slant. But switching to tv news for a few days convinced me that internet news is just as bad presentation/agenda wise. At least the television news doesn’t come with a comment section.
**Have you ever read the comments that accompany EVERY story on the internet? Those comments make me so sad for our planet. I hold out hope that it’s just the same 50 dumbasses posting over and over again under different names. But that’s a theory that’s too good to be true.**
I don’t miss any of it as much as I thought I would, and some of it I don’t miss at all.
Name
Izzy
Ethnicity
Human
Height
Tall enough to ride the ride. Short enough not to bang my head on most things.
Hair Color
Mostly brunette. Always up for an adventure though.
Eye Color
Brown.
Your opinions please?
Abortion
I am literally torn in half on this one. First and foremost I think everyone should have the right to live life on their own terms, and make their own choices, as long as they’re prepared to live with the consequences of those choices. So I don’t think the government, or your local church, or your neighbor, or coworker, has a right to speak into your life about your reproductive choices.
That being said (okay, written), I’m fairly disgusted by people who use abortion as birth control.
Capital Punishment
I think it’s useless. I have no moral objection to killing those too monstrous to be kept alive with the rest of us. But how long does it take the average person on death row to be executed? All that time the victim’s family is living in limbo waiting decades for their moment of closure. If someone who’s proven to be guilty is put on death row they should put to death within weeks. The way it is now it would be more humane for victim’s family if these killer were sentenced to life in a box so they could stop waiting for some date years in the future for their moment of closure.
Immigration
This country should make room for anyone who wants to work and take care of their family as long as they’re willing to follow our laws. If they come here to rape and pillage they need to be shown the door pretty quickly.
War
What a stupid question. Who is in favor of war, aside from politicians? Granted sometimes an answer of violence is necessary on this planet for the greater good, since true evil isn’t likely to sit down at a negotiating table. However the idea that we can end poverty or suffering or violence with violence is sort of baffling.
America
I think America is a favorite scapegoat among its own privileged citizens who like to think that they’re smarter than all of history and would be able to prevent everything bad that ever happened on this planet with their superior insight into the human condition. We’re far from perfect, but a lot of this planet is better off today then they otherwise would have been if America didn’t provide some sort of military/financial aid. But one has to look no further than our political discourse to see how far from great we truly are.
Gay Marriage
If you think being allowed to be married is going to solve discrimination I urge you to ask a black family (or any other married minority) if being married has shielded them from bigotry and stupidity.
If you think two guys down the street from you having a piece of paper from the state declaring them husband and husband is somehow going to cause a divorce in your home you’re an idiot.
The Economy
Rich people trying to solve poverty while finding ways to make themselves richer. As long as we allow ourselves to be governed by millionaires the economy is going to stay in shambles.
What:
Political Party are you
Super conservative on a few things, super liberal on a few, and varying degrees of both on the rest.
Extrovert or Introvert
Depends on the situation. I’m not shy, and love to meet new people. But I don’t need to hear myself talk all the time either, so I’m comfortable being quiet.
Favorite sport
Couldn’t care less. I enjoy running, but the idea that what I enjoy is better than what you enjoy is ludicrous.
Favorite person from that sport
Please.
Favorite person
My husband.
What bothers you
Selfishness.
What are you passionate about
Living life on my own terms.
What do you really think about yourself
I get along with myself pretty good. I’m not perfect, but I don’t struggle with my flaws either.
What is your favorite culture
Non-asshole
Most attractive ethnicity
Seriously? Who gives a shit? Like one culture is uglier or prettier than another.
Favorite childhood cartoon
Scooby Doo.
Favorite childhood memory
Most of them.
Favorite subject
Reading/Literature
What do you want to be when you grow up
Wealthy
What would be your ideal life
Rich enough to write full time.
1. Where do you call home?
Ohio. Born and raised in the northern part of the state, and now residing smack dab in the middle. I’ve moved out of state a few times, and I’ve never lived anywhere that I didn’t enjoy, but I’m very content here with four different seasons.
2. How long have you been blogging?
Almost a year here on WordPress. I blogged at Open Diary for many years, until they recently closed up shop and got swallowed into whatever hole stuff that used to be online goes to. I’ve also got a Blogger account that I keep (mostly) private, with a few random things available to the public.
3. How long have you been writing?
Since I was in elementary school. I used to carry a notebook everywhere, writing in every spare moment. I wrote more than 200 short stories in high school, overflowing the old trapper keepers that I used to keep them in.
4. Why did you start blogging?
If I’m ever going to sell a book I’ll need a place to advertise it from, so having an author blog makes sense. I also enjoy giving glimpses behind the scenes into my life. This place is where I can write about my process, ideas, frustrations and joys.
5. Why did you start writing?
I loved having someone read me a story as a child. Almost as much I loved telling stories, lining up stuffed animals and whatever else I could get my hands on to use as props. I couldn’t wait to learn to read, realizing that I would no longer have to wait for someone to have time to read to me. Along with learning to read we learned how to spell, and the day it dawned on me that I could write down words to tell my own story is the day I made the decision to be a writer.
6. What do you love most about blogging?
Getting to know new people. I don’t care what their gender, politics, religion, color, height, weight, favorite food, or age is. I just love getting to know people and finding out what gives them joy and what they wish they could change about the world around them.
7. What do you enjoy most about writing?
The ability to create an entire world. I’m in charge of all the emotions, all the joy, all the sadness, all the weather, all the money, and all the pain. I can create, sustain, destroy, and recreate at will.
8. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
I honestly don’t know. There are several places I’d love to live, just to see what they’re like. Whatever I end up doing, I’ll be writing, whether I’m searching for more success, or still trying to get something ready to unleash upon the world.
9. What is your favorite movie?
Impossible to pin down. It depends entirely on my mood. My tastes are all over the board. I love sci-fi, comedies, dramas, action, and even a few westerns.
10. If you could use any actress to play you in your life, who would you choose and why?
Elisabeth Shue. I’d love to meet her. But that desire has little to do with me thinking she resembles me. 🙂
11. Name the top 5 things on your bucket list.
I’m going to save this for another post, since explaining them will take too long. And if I list them without explaining them you’ll think me clinically insane.
12. Who or what inspired you to write?
I did it myself. I’ve had some people in my life who have been major encouragers, but there was never a time that I didn’t want to be a writer.
13. If you could be known for one thing in your life, what would it be?
I like to be remembered as someone who made people feel good and left things a little better than I found them.
14. Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
Anywhere. I seriously love to throw some clothes in a bag and hit the road for a day. Or two. Or three. I’d love to see Hawaii. I’d love to see Alaska. I’d love to see Africa, and finish visiting all 50 states.
15. Describe the best moment in your life.
When I saw this shirtless guy sitting on top of a ladder reading a paperback book. I realized that he was the same guy who’d been playing basketball with a bunch of inner-city 10 year olds earlier that morning, and that he was the same guy who’d been helping teach an adult literacy class at the youth center I worked at. My heart fluttered and I wondered if he could possibly be single.
He was. And we were friends soon after I first saw him, and dating within a few months. Today he’s my husband.
16. We’re headed to your neck of the woods for one day. What is one thing we have to do, and what restaurant we must eat at?
The bad news is there’s so much great stuff to do where I live that I can’t narrow it down any. But that’s also the great news. If we were in town we’d be watching a retro showing of Goldfinger in downtown Columbus this afternoon, and if you like classic movies there’s always one showing somewhere. There’s live theater, museums, college level sports, (I’m pretty sure OSU has a football team : D), and reservation-required fine dining. There are also plenty of chain restaurants, for folks like us who just like to hang with friends and have a burger and a beer and then watch a dvd in someone’s living room.
17. What is a tradition you and your family have?
For years when we were kids we opened our gifts on Christmas Eve, because at least one of my parents had to work on Christmas Day. People usually tell me I was cheated when I tell them that, but I don’t think so. We had to wait allllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll day to open those things, while they sat under the tree mocking us. And then on Christmas day we got to visit relatives with whatever parent was home, or watch tv and eat junk food all day if both were working.
18. We all love social media, share your links so we can follow you.
https://twitter.com/IsabellaEm1
A writer friend of mine, Angora Shade
**find Angora Shade on Twitter here: https://twitter.com/AngoraShade
At her blog here: http://angorashade.blogspot.com/
Or even on Smashwords here (where she has a FREE story available): https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/398088 **
recently wrote on her blog about writing what you know, and I was going to comment on there because it got my brain working, but my response was getting sort of wordy so I thought I’d blog about it myself, as long as everyone knows that her thoughts on the matter are what inspired me to start thinking/writing. So if you like what I have to say find her page and give her a written high-five. If you don’t like what I have to say please feel free to tell me why, just remember this is my blog, and if you don’t play nice with me I’ll take my toys and go home. (And I will totally accept anonymous comments on this blog, but I’m less likely to respond to or take them seriously if they have no name willing to stand by their opinion.)
Here’s her blog http://angorashade.blogspot.com/2014/02/to-write-what-you-know.html and with no further ado here’s the thoughts my brain subjected me to:
I believe that writers owe it to readers to write in a learned voice.
Ideally we’re writing things that we’ve lived through, and felt, and experienced. That’s the best form of learning after all.
But that can be pretty limiting. Because even if I’m writing what I’ve experienced I’m limited to my own experiences and frame of reference.
For instance I can write about having a brother, or about high school, but my experiences might be very different from most of the population, even if most people can relate to having a sibling or attending school. So I have a burden to at least include moments, even if just in passing, that are common to most readers, even though they didn’t grow up with my brother or attend my high school. Someone who never got called on in class when they didn’t know the answer can probably relate to that happening, even without having had my specific teacher in that specific classroom in that specific building in that specific town in my specific state.
So I think making the reader feel a sense of familiarity, even with something new and unknown to them, is important.
Hollywood has one advantage (okay, maybe several, but I’m just concerned with one right now), in that they can carefully cast an actor to help tell a story. Most of us haven’t been marooned on an island, but we can relate to Tom Hanks as an ‘everyman’, which helps us enter the story and picture ourselves in his circumstances.
We haven’t got that advantage (even if Hollywood comes calling for your book, it will only happen after you make it good enough to get their attention). We’ve got to make readers who know nothing about dungeons
or houseboats
or deserted islands
or bedbug infestations
or finding a man living in your attic
feel like they relate to our characters and the world we’re creating. If we keep it foreign they’ll tune out.
It’s totally fine to write about things you’ve never experienced, but you need to know something about them.
However I don’t think it’s fine to just write away with knowledge that you don’t have and haven’t made an effort to get. You can never replace real experience, but you owe it to your readers to learn. If you’re passionate enough to write about it, be passionate enough to learn about it.
In a world where research is often limited to watching a Youtube video and skimming something on Wikipedia, taking the time to learn is one of the things that will ultimately set you apart as a writer. Read about dungeons or murder or bedbugs or living on a houseboat. Read first hand accounts of people who have experienced those things, and learn what they felt. Read facts and statistics about those things. Seek out pictures in forums where there are comments, and read the comments paying attention to those who claim they LIVED on a houseboat or spent time chained in a dungeon or woke up covered in bedbugs.
Get outside and meet people in real life who can tell you stories.
If possible visit!
Taking a tour of a houseboat won’t give you a fraction of the insight that living on one will, but it’s bound to be more valuable than just guessing what the inside might look like.
Your most critical readers will be the ones who have actual experience with your subject matter. If they can tell two sentences in that the closest you’ve been to a dungeon is your grandmother’s finished basement, and the extent of your research was your thought: ‘people like dungeons so if I write about one I can sell books!’ they’ll disengage from your story, even if it’s decent, pretty quick.
Sure they might read noticing little details that aren’t perfect, but if you’ve made the effort (and have a decent story) most readers will overlook that.
(I have an uncle who was in the Korean War, and spent time stationed at a MASH unit. He loves the tv show MASH. I’ve spent time talking to him about writing and reality, and he’s often said that the show ‘feels’ so correct, that the parts that are pure Hollywood invention aren’t insulting. It’s interesting to note that the creative personnel behind MASH mostly didn’t have military backgrounds, but they interviewed extensively doctors and nurses and soldiers from MASH units, and made such an effort to know their subject that audience members who had a working knowledge of a real MASH felt that they’d nailed it.
I suspect that sense of realism carried over to fans who had no military experience as well. They might not know what was real and what wasn’t, but they could sense that it felt real.
You don’t have to have the experience. But you better be able to hold your own with someone who does, because if your writing feels inauthentic people won’t enjoy it. Even those who aren’t experts.
Anyone reading your story who lives on a houseboat might be able to tell that you haven’t actually lived on one. But why be lazy and communicate to every reader who’s ever set foot in a marina that you’re full of shit?
I need to blog more.
I suck at keeping this thing updated.
On the plus side I’ve been getting lots of writing done lately. On the minus side, it’s unlikely I’ll get Thanksgetting published by Fall of 2013. (Unless one of my readers has a time machine. In which case I’m willing to barter for the use of it.)
Work has been crazy lately. I don’t have a career type job, but I allowed myself to take a low-level management spot, just to insure my hours stay steady. It leaves me less time to write, but so would homelessness (or selling my body on the street corner to make ends meet). One way my company weeds out people who aren’t fit for management is to require most (not all, sometimes you’re in the right place at the right time) of new promotions to management spend six months to a year working third shift. It makes sure you’re committed, and if you can manage people overnight you can pretty much handle anything. I don’t mind the people, or the work. I miss the daylight though. If only I was independently wealthy and could forgo this whole ‘work’ fad and write full time.
Besides me trying to write like a maniac four or five hours a day, and sleep another eight, and work another nine, not a thing has been going on.
My husband is a champ, handling the lion’s share of the cooking/shopping while I’m doing this. (I think he has faith that someday I’ll make a dollar or two doing this and we can both retire early!)
In other exciting news the novel I’m going to write when I’m done with THIS one is falling into place pretty quick. At this rate it’ll be just a matter of finishing it, since I’ve already done large pieces of it. The end is finished, and the beginning is pretty well finished. And probably 60% or the middle….just gotta get the chapters in the right order….like putting together a puzzle. It’s still firmly in the erotica category, but going to hold a fair amount of sci-fi. Nothing too out there. Sort of a mad scientist as a sex therapist sort of thing.
I need someone to challenge me with some topics to blog about!
I need to blog more often, so give me some inspiration!
Or cookies!
Love you all, Izzy
I’ve been writing since I was a child. Since I learned to write. My favorite time in any class, at any age, was the chance to write a story. I loved being in control of an entire world, and I could do that when I wrote. I could be the creator and/or destroyer of that world.
I’ve always enjoyed reading as well. Pick just about any genre, and I can name something in it I’ve read and enjoyed.
So I’ve always been fascinated with words, and how they work. I’m fascinated (and even more disgusted) how politicians can use words to blatantly lie without technically being dishonest. I’m in love with the idea that writing can be both life changing, and purely entertaining. Problems can be solved, and created, with our words. Jokes can be told, feelings can be hurt, relationships can be nurtured and destroyed, and every emotion felt by a person can be expressed and shared on the page.
I’m also fascinated by how people write.
I know that some authors limit themselves to writing for a set amount of time each day, and then pack it in at the end of that time, regardless of how much they’ve gotten done.
Others set a page/chapter/word goal, and work until that chosen number has been reached, no matter how long or quick it takes to get there.
I’m not fortunate enough to be able to write as my only source of income. So I work a crazy schedule and write whenever I can, while trying to lead my life, and maintain my sanity.
What works best for me is to just write in marathon sessions when I have time. If I have four hours, dedicate myself to writing for all four of them. If it’s less than an hour I spend it proofreading and adding those dreaded missing words.
**I have a bad habit of getting ‘in the zone’ and typing fast, skipping words, and leaving the spellcheck for later. As a result small and necessary words like the, and, at, is, or it tend to get left out, which wouldn’t be a problem, except when I proofread my brain KNOWS the word is supposed to be there, and tricks my eyes into seeing it. So something I’ve read five or six times will all of the sudden on the seventh or eighth pass have A MISSING WORD. I have no scientific explanation or proof of this happening of course, it’s just my theory about what happens. Hang around this blog for a bit. I have lots of theories. Lots and lots.**
What works best for you?
How do YOU write?
What is it that you absolutely need sexually?
Ok, I’m immediately fulfilling a gender stereotype by talking about emotions, but this is my blog, and since I only need my approval I’ll allow it. I absolutely need to feel valued. In my single days I learned awfully fast that there are a lot of guys interested solely in their own orgasm, and they were more than willing to use me as nothing more than a toy to masturbate with. I want to feel that sharing my genitals with someone has a value to them beyond their own needs. Doesn’t have to define itself as love, and soft music, and months of flowers and dating and hand holding walks etc. It just means that if all you WANT is an orgasm you can do that yourself, just like I can. If you WANT to share that orgasm with me, and share mine, and all the bells and whistles that go along with that, I’m going to get on board a lot faster.
What is something you have always wanted to try?
I’ve always wanted to try a threesome. I’m not opposed to two males and me, but I think I’d prefer another female to join my husband and I. I think women are a bit calmer when it comes to things like this, and would be more ‘in the moment’ instead of trying to cram twenty years worth of fantasy into the event and ruining their own enjoyment. I really like the idea of being close enough to touch two people while they have sex, and another set of hands and fingers can’t possibly be all bad.
What is something you have never done in bed before?
Played Scrabble.
What time of day do you like to have sex?
There is no ‘wrong’ time. I think the best time for us is a long afternoon when we both have the day off. We have blackout curtains on the bedroom windows, and we turn on the fan, crank up the stereo (for reasons I’ll not explore here thunderstorms do to me what Viagra is supposed to do for men) with our Thunderstorm CD on repeat, and have at it for a few hours.
What do you absolutely need to see to turn you on?
A smile. Another ‘girl’ answer I’m sure, but knowing my man is right where he wants to be is more of a panty dropper than seeing him naked. Not that I object to looking at him naked. He texted me a picture the other day that kept me very distracted.
How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?
As long as I need to. Depends on the situation of course, but I’m a big believer in slowly building anticipation.
If someone was in the next room while you had sex would it make you nervous or excited?
Would depend who it was I guess. Knowing that the neighbors hear me scream on occasion is a turn on for me. But I wouldn’t be turned on thinking I was ruining someone’s sleep before an important job interview, or making someone uncomfortable.
Have you ever faked an orgasm?
I’m ashamed to admit that I have. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I didn’t like put on a show or anything, I just lied when he’d asked if I was finished. I never have faked with my husband. I think we’re strong enough that his ego isn’t destroyed if sometimes I don’t get there, or if I need a bit of ‘extra’ help to finish.
What Part of your body are you self-conscious about?
I’m comfortable with who I am. I wish I had better dental checkups, but fortunately no one can tell that I have dental problems by looking at my smile, and it’s not like it’s something I spend hours obsessing about. Unless I’m writing a check to the dentist.
Do you have any sexual regrets?
I regret being too shy to masturbate with my college roommate my freshman year of college. We’d gotten close, and I actually used to pretend to sleep while she had sex with her boyfriend, and she’d pretend to sleep while I had my boyfriend over. One night after several wine coolers (remember how sophisticated you felt at 19 drinking wine coolers?) we both confessed to being horny. She played with her vibrator and let me watch, and asked if she could watch me. I chickened out of doing it in front of her, but watched her, and have regretted that wasted opportunity a lot.
If a lover cheated on you would you take them back?
Off the top of my head I’m going to say ‘NO’, but I guess that would depend on the circumstances.
How Important is sex in your life?
Very.
How Important is love in your life?
Very.
What is the biggest fight you have ever had with a bf/gf?
I’ve had several disagreements with my husband (I know….shocking right?), and used to argue with boyfriends once in a while, but I’ve never had a ‘caught you in bed with someone else’ sort of fight. Am I lame?
Do you believe in make-up sex?
Sure, but not because it fixes problems in a relationship. But it’s fun! My husband and I often make stupid wagers, and the loser has to pleasure the other one orally. We don’t apply this to serious issues like deciding how to spend money or whether to have children, but to the outcome of ball games or trivia questions.
Have you ever told a complete stranger something you kept from a lover?
Yes. And she’s probably reading this.
Have you ever had a one night stand?
Yes.
Have you ever rebounded and known you were doing so?
Sure. But that’s half the fun of college right?
Who did you lose your virginity to?
It saddens me to think we live in a world where people would actually post a name to this question on social media.
When and Where did you lose your virginity?
In high school, in a camper out by the lake with my boyfriend. A bunch of us went camping (everyone had their own tents/campers….it’s not like it was an orgy or anything) and it was a rainy perfect night. (That’s not where my love of rain comes from though….I already had it before that night!)
If you could go back in time would you change it or take it back?
Nope.
Would you go down on your bf/gf under a restaurant table?
Probably not, but I’m not saying no. I have been known to get handsy in public places.
Where would you have sex in public?
Not in front of children or anything. But I do like the thrill of the great outdoors.
Would you ever have sex while at work?
No.
Would you have sex in the corner of a department store?
Nope.
Would you have sex in the rain?
OH. GOD. YES.
What movie makes you horny?
Has less to do with the movie and more to do with who I’m watching it with.
What is the highest number of orgasms you have had in one sex romp?
Too many to count. My husband is awesome.
How many do you wish you could have?
As long as we both walk away (pass out) satisfied, what does it matter?
What do you like Trimmed,Shaved or natural?
I like to stay neatly trimmed.
Would you have sex in a dressing room?
Yes.
What sounds do you like to hear during sex?
I think I’ve beat this to death, but the rain pounding on the roof and thunder. Not to mention the moans and groans of my partner having a great time.
What sounds do you make during sex?
Our neighbors once called the cops. I was embarrassed. My husband was pretty proud though.
What words do you love to hear during sex?
“YES!” is usually a winner.
What do you yell during an orgasm?
It’s not very original, but “I’M CUMMING!’ usually gets yelled.
How many times a week do you like to have sex?
As many as possible. I’m not trying to be cute. I honestly love sex.
Do you want to try the 69 position?
It’s not a favorite, but it’s in the usual lineup.
What are your three fav. positions?
Missionary, doggy (me bent over the table, or the counter, or the couch, since standing allows a deeper thrust), and me on top.
What are the top 3 erogenous zones on your body?
Why would I limit it to three? I obviously have some, but they depend more on the amount of foreplay than a simple touch.
Top or Bottom?
Bottom.
Bedroom or other room?
Bedroom AND all the other rooms.
Lights on or off?
On. Definitely on.
Public or Private?
Private.
Partially or Entirely naked?
Entirely naked. Not there’s anything wrong with a quickie.
Oil & Lotion or Candles & Egyptian Cotton Sheets?
Why not all of the above? If I have to pick I’ll go with candles and soft sheets.
Naughty Videos or Hot Photos?
I find photos more erotic.
Lacy Panties/Silk Boxers or Leather?
Lacy and silk!
Fast & Hard or Slow & Gentle?
Both please!
Standing up or Laying down?
Both!
Soft or Firm touch?
Both!
Under Covers or On top?
On top.
Would you ever have sex in your childhood bedroom?
Sure. I did by myself in high school, might as well add a partner to the mix.
Have you ever hooked up on a swing set?
I’ve done it on a slide in the park playground.
Is there any desire that you want to try that you think is taboo?
I am very turned on by……nevermind….maybe another time.
Any New Positions you havent done but want to try?
Nope.
Do you have any sexual fetishes you want to explore?
Yes!
Are there any secret desires you have never told?
Yes.
Where in the house is your favorite spot to have sex?
Living room floor by the fireplace.
What is your favorite thing about sex?
All of it.
What is your favorite sexual setting?
The roof of our house on a quiet, moonlit night. Our air mattress, some wine, and some soft music.
Would you ever work out nude?
I do all the time.
Would you ever make a porno with your bf/gf?
We have.
Would you ever do a photo shoot in sexy clothes for your bf/gf?
Oh yes.
Do you think you need sex more or less often than the average person?
More. I am a very high drive person. Fortunately so is my husband.
Taking a break from ‘real’ writing, and thought I’d unclutter my brain by giving you another peek into my private life.
Details
Age 33
Where do you live (country) The United States
Ethnicity (white, afro-carribean, etc) White
Sexuality More and more I’m thinking bi-curious. I have NEVER touched another woman sexually, and was never really curious about it, until about a year ago. I’m still not 100% sure it’s something I’d be brave enough to try, but the thought is there…..
Weight I’m answering this under protest. We judge ourselves too harshly compared to other women. I’ve done it, and I don’t want anyone doing it comparing themselves to me. I am truly blessed to have the body I have that requires as little starving/exhaustive exercise as it does. I’m happy with how I look. My husband gets aroused looking at me, and I have strange men flirt with me all the time, so I know I’m blessed. I work out a bit, but I’m not fanatical about it. In fact I eat a lot, and stay fit looking. I will admit to this though: I’m heavier than I look. For the past decade EVERY doctor/nurse who’s weighed me has been sort of surprised. I guess I’m solid lol. 132 lbs.
Bust size I’m probably reading too much into this, but again I don’t think this is that important. 36B. It’s enough to wrap around my husband, (although I’d never make a porn star jealous), and they make him happy if I do any jumping or bouncing near him.
Nipples size (v.small/small/med/large/v.large) Medium I guess. I’ve never really compared. They’re enough that noticeable through my bra when I’m cold. I believe in layers for this very reason.
Areola (bit around the nipple)(v.small/small/med/large/v.large) Average I guess.
Nipple shape, (flat or puffed out) A bit puffed out.
Nipple color The regular normal color. (That pic on my Twitter feed is ME!)
Are you happy with the size and shape of your breasts/nipples Yes. Although I worried a lot at age 12 how they would turn out lol.
Are you happy with your weight and shape Extremely. But I like to think these things could change and I’d still be happy. My happiness isn’t tied into my looks. It’s tied into my life.
Vagina outer lips (v.small/small/med/large/v.large) Medium? Do people that aren’t me pay a lot of attention to this? No one has ever told me they were abnormally tiny/large, so I’ll go with normal.
Vagina inner lips (v.small/small/med/large/v.large) Same answer as above.
Clitoris (v.small/small/med/large/v.large) Sticking with my average answer here. Someone help me? Do men pay attention to this in a comparing way (those that can even find the damn thing!)? Do lesbians?
Pubic hair (full bush, trimmed, partially I bounce back and forth between trimmed, shaped, and shaved. I’m not a slave to any particular style. (More like laziness lol….I trim as the mood hits me….my husband has no serious preference….although when it’s time to shave he’s a willing participant!)
Color of pubic hair My normal brunette color. Although when I dye my hair black or blonde I leave the pubes (if I have any at the time) alone.
Are you happy with the way your vagina looks I suppose. I’ve never seriously considered it before.
Current Habits
Do you masturbate Yes.
If yes how often It probably averages to five times a week. Give or take.
At what time of day do you usually masturbate I don’t have a set schedule lol. When I need/want to/am able to.
Where do you normally masturbate In the cereal aisle of the grocery store? I shouldn’t joke, I’m sure someone has. We caught someone at work doing it in the fitting room once. Often I do it in bed, although the couch or bathtub aren’t bad second choices.
Where else have you masturbated Canned fruit aisle if cereal is real crowded.
Techniques
Do you ever rub your clit during masturbation (Never, sometimes, most times, every time) Yes. Every time.
Do you ever insert fingers into your vagina during masturbation (Never, sometimes, most times, every time) Most times.
Do you ever play with your anus during masturbation (Never, sometimes, most times, every time) I have. But it’s not something I’m into. At least not usually.
Do you ever play with your nipples during masturbation (Never, sometimes, most times, every time) Every time.
Do you ever stroke yourself anywhere else during masturbation, if so where LOL…everywhere! I can’t keep my hands off of myself!
Do you get naked to masturbate (totally/waist down/cloths on hand in pants) Usually naked, but in a pinch I can improvise.
Toys
Have you ever used a sex toy to masturbate, if yes what type Too many to list here! My rabbit, my Hitachi, and I have a G-spot vibrator, and two little pocket ones.
Have you ever used a hair brush to masturbate Maybe the handle as a teen. Maybe. I’m not going to confirm. But in all honesty I can’t deny either.
Have you ever used a vegetable to masturbate, if yes what type No I haven’t. But I’m not opposed…..
Have you ever used a marker pen to masturbate No.
Have you ever used anything else (other than your fingers), if yes what Do other people’s fingers count?
Do you own your own sextoy, if so what type I sure as hell don’t rent!
Have you ever masturbated using water, if so what and where I have a detachable shower head. It’s awesome.
What turns you on
Do you ever look at online pornography, are you turned on by it Not often. In fact pretty rarely, but if it’s the right kind of stuff, and I’m in the right mood, then yes it turns me on.
Do you ever look at pornographic magazines, are you turned on by them It’s been a long time, but my intro to sex came from my dad’s stash of dirty magazines. I suppose they turned me on way back when, but I’m not sure if that’s because I found them arousing, or if I was just excited to be seeing something that I knew was forbidden.
Have you ever heard some one else masturbating, who was it, were you turned on by it Yes. My college roommate. Yes it was a turn on.
Have you ever heard some one else having sex, who was it, were you turned on by it Yes, a few times. One of my roommates in college used to bring her boyfriend over, and she’d let me watch (I used to return the favor of course….I think both guys were oblivious and thought each of us were sleeping).
Have you ever seen someone else masturbating, who was it, were you turned on by it Same roommate. It was a turn on, and a missed opportunity. She asked me if I wanted to do it while she was so she could see me and I declined. At the time I didn’t think I wanted to. But I think about that afternoon A LOT!
Have you ever seen someone else having sex, who was it, were you turned on by it Same roommate and her boyfriend. I enjoyed it. A lot.
Orgasm
What percentage of the time do you orgasm from masturbation Upwards of 99%. Sometimes I get distracted by my own mind or a ringing phone and the mood goes away, but usually I don’t start unless it’s something I’m in the mood for.
How long does it normally take you to reach orgasm from masturbation I can get there quick if I have to, but why rush? Getting there is half the fun!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how wet do you get during orgasm 7.3802749 (I don’t know how to answer this…..wet enough I guess lol)
Do you ever “squirt” Once!
First Time
At what age did you first get pleasure from touching yourself 13.
At what age did you first have an orgasm from touching yourself 13
Self Image
Have you ever watched yourself orgasm in a mirror Yes.
If yes how did you think you looked I think it was kind of sexy
If yes how did it make you feel Same answer.
Have you ever felt guilty during/after masturbation As a teenager, I often wondered if I was too obsessed with sex. (I still think I am, but it doesn’t bother me!).
Playing with friends
Have you ever watched a guy masturbate, if yes did he orgasm, who was it Yes. Yes. My husband.
Has a guy ever watched you masturbate, if yes did you orgasm, who was it Yes. Yes. My husband.
Have you ever been masturbated by a guy, if yes did you orgasm, who was it Yes all the time! Yes! My husband. And there have been others before that.
Have you ever masturbated a guy, if yes did he orgasm, who was it Yes. God yes! My husband, and just about every boyfriend I ever had. And few who weren’t boyfriends.
Have you ever done mutual masturbation with a guy (each other at the same time), if yes did you both orgasm, who was it Yes. Yes. My husband. A few boyfriends.
Have you ever watched a girl masturbate, if yes did she orgasm, who was it Yes. Yes. Roommate. And maybe a girl on Skype.
Has a girl ever watched you masturbate, if yes did you orgasm, who was it Maybe yes. Maybe yes. Maybe someone on Skype.
Have you ever been masturbated by a girl, if yes did you orgasm, who was it No.
Have you ever masturbated a girl, if yes did she orgasm, who was it No.
Have you ever done mutual masturbation with a girl (each other at the same time), if yes did you both orgasm, who was it Maybe. Maybe (probably!) A Skype acquaintance.
And finally
What are you favorite masturbation fantasies The roommate.
Do you have any masturbation pearls of wisdom for us I don’t think so.
And there you go dear reader. You now know some things that no one else does.
Now you know me a bit better.
Love Isabella!
Love, Isabella 